Alright so Poland, France, Belgium, and Britain are all sitting at a table, enjoying themselves from the free drinks that everyone forced Germany to buy while he was still hungover and drunk from the night before. Germany, who has severely sobered up is incredibly pissed now that he has realized he spent 100$ on drinks, and he talks in secret with Russia and all his friends about starting something. Japan overhears and asks if he can join in. Germany shrugs and agrees, and meanwhile Russia has taken a dare from Bulgaria to get as drunk as physically possible without falling unconscious. Britain is watching and listening intentivly to Germany’s plans, but eventually shrugs it off so he can return to his pint. Germany then stands up, walks over to Poland, and smashes his glass over Poland’s head. Poland falls on the floor unconscious, and then Britain quickly protests saying Germany shouldn’t do that, before turning to France and nodding as if he achieved world peace. Germany shrugs, and then punches Belgium in the face. Japan then looks at America, who is sitting at a table with Canada (Who has been shouting at Britain with encouraging thoughts). Japan takes his glass, and then throws it at America. It knocks America’s hawaiian style Pina Colada out of his hand. Then America turns towards Japan, and stands up to reveal that he is actually 7 feet tall. Japan instantly regrets his decision. Britain finally gets up from his seat only to barricade himself behind the bar and throw empty pint glasses at Germany (While Canada supplies him) as Germany now has France in a chokehold. Russia is now impossibly drunk, and Germany turns towards him and asks for him to stop drinking and help. Russia then takes a bar stool and wildly begins to swing at Germany, who dodges as Russia trips and falls onto the floor unconscious, throwing the barstool up in the air. During this whole conflict, Italy has been hiding under a table screaming curse words at an unconscious Poland. America, who has stabbed Japan in the stomach 47 times with a broken pint glass, turns towards a fatigued Germany who has gotten tired from fighting Britain and then smashes him over the head with a barstool. The barstool that Russia had thrown in the air comes back down onto Germany. France gets up from the chokehold which had left him unconscious, and is now schizophrenic and proceeds to the corner of the bar to talk to argue with himself for a while. America then walks over to a crying Japan who is trying to hide himself behind the bar, and continues to stab him another 59 times with a throwing dart he found. Russia then wakes up to find a very phased Germany, and proceeds to take all the money in his wallet so he can get drunk again. After finishing with japan America walks to the front of the room and shouts “I DID IT!”
“If World War II Were a Bar Fight” -Casey Rugh
